Why Lazy DMs Kill Buyer Trust

Nobody likes being sold to immediately. And if that's your LinkedIn strategy, you better stop now. I see it in my DMs every single day. "Hey Ben, want to double your AUM in 90 days?" "Looking for more qualified leads?" "Let me show you our proven system." Delete. Delete. Delete. Why? If you're only DMing people on LinkedIn to pitch your offer, you're not building relationships. → You're burning bridges before they're even built. And for financial advisors? This approach will kill your credibility faster than anything else. Your clients don't buy financial products. →They buy trust. → They buy confidence that you'll protect their family's future. → They buy the belief that you genuinely care about their goals, not just your commission. When your first interaction is a sales pitch, It's like you've told them: "I don't care about you. I care about what you can do for me." And in an industry built on trust and long-term relationships? That's the fastest way to lose before you even start. Here's what YOU can do instead: 1) Start with curiosity, not a pitch. When someone accepts your connection request, don't immediately go for the close. Instead, ask a thoughtful question. Example: "I saw you just celebrated 10 years in the industry, what's the biggest shift you've seen in how clients make decisions?" Show them you're interested in them, not just their wallet. 2) Comment before you DM. Engage with their content first. Add value to their audience. When you eventually message them, you're not a stranger, you're someone who already showed up. 3) Share value first. Lead with something useful: → A relevant article → A strategy that worked for you → A genuine compliment on their post No pitch. No agenda. Just value. 4) Play the long game. My best clients didn't come from cold pitches. They came from months of genuine interaction. → Commenting, sharing insights, offering help with no strings attached. When they were ready to buy, my name already had a place in their mind. I stopped asking, "How can I sell to this person?" And started asking, "How can I serve this person?" That turned LinkedIn from a cold-calling platform into a relationship-building machine. Stop selling. Start serving. And the clients will follow. So, what's your biggest challenge with LinkedIn outreach? Let's chat 💬 P.s. ✍🏻 I am Benjamin Loh, CSP, a strategic growth coach and consultant who has taught over 65,000 leaders in over 20 global cities and constructed some of the leading icons (TOT, Award Winners) in the financial industry in Asia through the power of authentic storytelling and authority building. 💪 Follow me for personal brand and growth insights. #financialadvisors #linkedInstrategy #personalbranding #contentcreation

Stop trying to sell in the first message. You're not Amazon Prime. People don’t open LinkedIn expecting to make a purchase. They’re here to connect. To learn. To be inspired. But too many treat DMs like a checkout page instead of a conversation. Every week, I get cold messages that jump straight into a pitch. No introduction. No context. No attempt to build trust. And the result? Silence. Because when you lead with selling, you lose the one thing that actually drives conversions on LinkedIn: relationships. Here’s what most people get wrong about selling in the DMs. They think speed equals success. They think dropping their offer in message one makes them efficient. But it’s not efficient. It’s lazy. And it rarely works. Over time, I’ve found a better way. It’s slower. More intentional. But it leads to real conversations with decision-makers — and more closed deals. Here’s what I do instead: ↗︎ Step 1: Build trust first Start with something specific about them. A recent post. A podcast. A shared interest. Make it personal. Not robotic. ↗︎ Step 2: Ask thoughtful questions Your goal is not to qualify. Your goal is to connect. Be curious about their goals, challenges, and context. ↗︎ Step 3: Share value before asking for anything This could be an insight, a trend you’re seeing, or a tip they can use right away. When you give first, you earn permission to ask. ↗︎ Step 4: Make the invite to chat feel natural Don’t pitch a 30-minute strategy call. That’s heavy. Just suggest a quick 15-minute call to connect and explore if there’s alignment. ↗︎ Step 5: Follow up without being annoying People are busy, not rude. Give them time. Follow up once or twice — kindly, not aggressively. This approach works. Not because it’s some magic script. But because it treats people like people. So the next time you think about pitching in the first message, remember: You're not Amazon Prime. Trust isn't delivered in 24 hours. Build it first. Found this useful? Hit the 🔔 icon in my profile. Get notified of my next post. Repost it to help 1 new person. ♻️

Cold DMs are not dead. But starting every conversation from zero is. A lot of founders think the only way to create client conversations is to message more people. So they send more DMs. But if the person has never seen your thinking, does not understand your offer, and has no reason to trust you yet, the DM has to do all the work. → it has to create attention. → explain the problem. → create interest. → handle doubt. → build trust. → move someone toward a call. That is a lot to ask from one message. This is why cold outreach often feels hard. Not always because the message is bad. But because there is no trust built before the message. A content-to-client path works differently. 1. Your content builds familiarity. 2. Your opinions show how you think. 3. Your profile explains what you do. 4. Your lead magnet gives people a next step. 5. Your emails keep building trust. Then, when a conversation happens, it does not feel like a random pitch. It feels like a natural continuation. That is the difference. Cold DM: "I know nothing about you. Why are you messaging me?" Content-to-Client Path: "I’ve seen your thinking. I understand what you do. This conversation makes sense." That is why I don’t see content and DMs as separate. But content and DMs are still not the full path. Because not every interested person is ready for a conversation. Some people will read your posts, agree with your thinking, and still not be ready to reply, book, or buy. That is where lead magnets and emails matter. And yes, you can educate people through posts. But posts are scattered. Someone may see one post, miss the next five, and never get the full picture. A lead magnet and emails give interested people a clearer path. They raise their hand, take a smaller step, and get the thinking in the right order. That is different from hoping the algorithm shows them enough posts before they forget. So the path is not: → Post content → Send DMs → Hope someone replies The path is: → Build trust through content → Make the offer clear through positioning → Give interested people a smaller next step → Keep educating them through emails. Then start better conversations when the timing makes sense. The goal is not to avoid conversations. The goal is to make better conversations easier to start. Because when people already trust how you think, the DM does not have to convince from zero. It only has to open the door. P.S. If someone received your DM today, would they understand who you help, why your offer matters, and why the conversation makes sense? Comment below. ♻️ Repost this for founders who are trying to start more conversations, but are making every conversation start cold.

Your cold DMs are killing your reputation before you even get a response. I know because I've received 100's of them & sent plenty of bad ones myself.   My message requests are filled with "I can get you leads" and "Want to try our tool?" pitches that instantly make me ignore the sender. These low-effort messages are ineffective, and they're actively damaging your professional reputation with every send. When someone blasts me with a generic pitch, I immediately think less of them. That relationship is damaged before it even starts. Now, there is a solution but it requires actual work: Send 10 focused DMs instead of 1,000 spray-and-pray messages. But to make those personalized DM's effective, I suggest you: 1) Create something valuable specifically for them. "I noticed your new products are fire but there's nowhere to buy them online. I built you a simple Shopify page to sell them. Mind if I share the link?" 2) Record a personalized Loom video identifying 2-3 specific issues with their website/content and how to fix them. Both approaches require research and customization. You can't scale them to thousands of messages. But the truth is that 10 well-researched DMs that get 9 responses will always outperform 1,000 generic messages that get the same 9 responses.

No one is replying to your cold outreach. And it’s not because your message is “too short” or you’re not using enough emojis. Here’s the real reason and how to fix it. If you’re wondering: “Why are my DMs being ignored?” It’s not your tools or algorithm. It’s your dm method . Let me explain. You don’t need to do more. You need to do it right. 1.Target People Who Can Say Yes Many people are sending offers to those who can’t even pay them Or worse, people who aren’t even in enough pain to care. That’s why it feels like yelling into the void. If you don’t target people who: Have the money Have the problem Have urgency to solve it …then it doesn’t matter how “personalized” your message is. It’s dead on arrival. Start by getting brutally honest: Who exactly do I help? What’s their urgent problem right now? Can they say yes without asking 3 other people? Outreach is not a numbers game. It’s a relevance game. 2.Lead With Relationship, Not a Pitch No one likes strangers barging into their inbox with a pitch. Especially if you’ve done nothing to build trust. Instead of forcing your offer, position yourself as the solution. Treat cold outreach like cold networking, not cold selling. That means: Engage with their content first Leave a meaningful comment Follow up with something that shows you did your homework Ask questions, not favors Even 5 strategic DMs/day will beat 50 generic messages. Most people chase volume. But volume without trust is silence. 3.Do Research Most People Skip You can tell when someone wrote a lazy DM. Research like a sniper. What are they launching? What’s not working in their funnel? What language do they use to describe their problem? Now you’re not just “another pitch.” You’re someone who gets it. Don’t promise what you hope you can do. Promise what you’re sure you can deliver. Confidence is attractive. Desperation is repellant. 4. Consistency Beats Complexity Outreach isn’t about doing more and more and more. It’s about doing the right things consistently. That means: Clear offer Strategic targeting Human-first outreach Real positioning (not just pitching) You don’t need 10 new strategies. You need to double down on the right one every single day. If your outreach isn’t working, here’s your cheat code: Talk to the right people Approach like a person, not a pitch deck Know what you’re offering and why it matters Do less, but do it sharper Stay consistent and stay relevant You don’t need to be everywhere. You need to be irresistible to the right people, in the right way.

People don't buy from strangers. They buy from people they recognize. Your cold DMs aren't working. Not because your offer is bad. Because you're a stranger. Think about it: would you respond to someone you've never seen before asking for your time, money, or attention? Probably not. But if someone who's been commenting on your posts, sharing valuable insights, and actually engaging with your work reaches out? That's different. That feels like a conversation, not a pitch. Here's what I do now: Before I reach out to anyone, I make sure they've seen my name at least 3-5 times. A comment here. A share there. A thoughtful reply to their story. By the time I DM them, I'm not introducing myself. I'm continuing a relationship that already started. And that changes everything. Because people don't buy from strangers. They buy from people they trust. And trust isn't built in a DM. It's built in the dozens of micro interactions before it. So if your outreach isn't working, maybe it's not your message. Maybe it's your approach. Show up first. Add value first. Build trust first. Then reach out. Do you engage before you DM, or do you go straight for the pitch?

Sellers comment randomly (or not at all), so they stay invisible or show up without a clear lane. Buyers don’t build familiarity or trust. You still feel like an outsider, your DMs land cold, and every conversation starts with skepticism. Comment consistently in the problem spaces your buyers care about. Over time, buyers quietly notice: — You understand their world ( show up where their real problems live.) — You’re focused ( one lane, clear perspective, consistent presence.) — You’re credible ( demonstrate expertise through insight, not self-promotion.) — You’re safe to engage ( no surprise pitch, just thoughtful dialogue.) — You’re memorable ( familiarity builds trust and lowers resistance.) — You’re generous ( add value, ask smart questions, and connect people.) By the time you reach out, you’re not “some salesperson.” You’re the person who consistently adds something useful to the conversations they already care about.

80% to 90% of DMs on LinkedIn are ignored. Not because people hate DMs. But because they hate bad approaches. People don’t hate being messaged. They hate being pitched without context. The problem isn’t sending a DM. The problem is sounding desperate, robotic, or transactional. If your first message feels like a sales script, You’ve already lost. Here’s a simple framework to DM like a pro: 1. Context First. Always. Start with relevance. ▪️Mention their post ▪️Mention a shared interest ▪️Create common ground Show them this isn't a copy-and-paste message →Context lowers resistance. 2. Lead with Curiosity, Not Conversion Don’t jump into your offer. Ask thoughtful, light questions. “How long have you been working on this?” “What’s been your biggest challenge with that?” →Curiosity builds conversation. Conversation builds trust. 3. Add Value Before You Ask Instead of asking for a call immediately: Offer a small insight. No pressure. No pitch. Just value. →Value shifts the dynamic from seller to trusted expert. 4. Permission-Based Transition If the conversation flows, then ask: “Would you be open to a quick suggestion?” “Can I share something that might help?” This keeps you respectful and confident. →Professionals respect permission. 5. The Soft Offer If there’s alignment: “Based on what you shared, I think I can help. Would you like to explore that?” →Subtle confidence wins. Cold pitching kills trust. Warm conversations build Trust Your goal in the DM is not to close. It’s to connect. DM to start conversation not to end one. How do you respond to long pitch DMs, has your DM ever been ignored before?