Mentoring As A Leadership Tool

In 2008, Michael Phelps won Olympic GOLD - completely blind. The moment he dove in, his goggles filled with water. But he kept swimming. Most swimmers would’ve fallen apart. Phelps didn’t - because he had trained for chaos, hundreds of times. His coach, Bob Bowman, would break his goggles, remove clocks, exhaust him deliberately. Why? Because when you train under stress, performance becomes instinct. Psychologists call this stress inoculation. When you expose yourself to small, manageable stress: - Your amygdala (fear centre) becomes less reactive. - Your prefrontal cortex (logic centre) stays calmer under pressure. Phelps had rehearsed swimming blind so often that it felt normal. He knew the stroke count. He hit the wall without seeing it. And won GOLD by 0.01 seconds. The same science is why: - Navy SEALs tie their hands and practice underwater survival. - Astronauts simulate system failures in zero gravity. - Emergency responders train inside burning buildings. And you can build it too. Here’s how: ✅ Expose yourself to small discomforts. Take cold showers. Wake up 30 minutes earlier. Speak up in meetings. The goal is to build confidence that you can handle hard things. ✅ Use quick stress resets. Try cyclic sighing: Inhale deeply through your nose. Take a second small inhale. Exhale slowly through your mouth. Repeat 3-5 times to calm your system fast. ✅ Strengthen emotional endurance. Instead of avoiding difficult conversations, hard tasks, or feedback - lean into them. Facing small emotional challenges trains you for bigger ones later. ✅ Celebrate small victories. Every time you stay calm, adapt, or keep going under pressure - recognise it. These tiny wins are building your mental "muscle memory" for resilience. As a new parent, I know my son Krish will face his own "goggles-filled-with-water" moments someday. So the best I can do is model resilience myself. Because resilience isn’t gifted - it’s trained. And when you train your brain for chaos, you can survive anything. So I hope you do the same. If this made you pause, feel free to repost and share the thought. #healthandwellness #mentalhealth #stress

The Pulley System that built our careers is changing and fading in your mid 40's. For two decades, most of us have operated on a "Pulley System." We brought the qualifications, skills, the results, and the late nights—and in return, senior mentors and sponsors acted as the pulley, amplifying our work and ensuring our impact was visible in the rooms where the biggest decisions were made. But as we hit our mid-40s, the mechanics of that system change. Our long-term sponsors, the ones who know our track record best, are naturally transitioning into retirement, board roles, or advisory positions. They aren't "losing power"; they are successfully passing the baton. However, for the executive still in the arena, it creates a quiet challenge: The Advocacy Gap. When the people who championed your merit move on, your career longevity can no longer rely on legacy relationships. It must rely on a strategic redesign of your network. Based on my experience, sharing some insights on how to navigate the "Sponsorship Gap" While Leveling Up: 1. Build Horizontal Advocacy: Don’t just look "up" for support. Look across. Your peers in Tech, Operations, wider Finance teams, Legal etc. are your future co-creators. When your peers advocate for your expertise, it carries a different, often more potent weight than traditional top-down sponsorship. 2. Invest in "Reverse Mentorship": The leaders of 2035 are currently rising through the ranks. By mentoring the next generation now, you stay tethered to the evolving pulse of the organization. You aren't just giving back; you’re building a new foundation of loyalty and fresh perspectives. 3. Externalize Your Professional Brand: If your internal "inner circle" is thinning, your industry reputation must do the heavy lifting. Lead industry-wide initiatives, contribute to white papers, or speak at global forums. When the market recognizes your value, your organization has a clear reason to double down on it. 4. Maintain Content "Edge" Relevance: Avoid the trap of becoming a pure "people manager." Stay close to the shifting tools of your trade, whether that’s AI integration or digital transformation. High-level expertise remains the ultimate shield against organizational shifts. Our mentors opened the doors because we proved we belonged in the room. Now, as they move toward new chapters, it’s our turn to own the keys and to start building the pulleys for those coming up behind us. Have you noticed your advocacy network shifting as your long-term mentors transition? How are you intentionally rebuilding those bridges? #Leadership #CareerLongevity #ExecutivePresence #Networking #Mentorship #MidCareerStrategy

Why Being a “Mentern” is Essential in the Modern Workplace While it never won any Oscars, the film “The Intern” reminded us that experience never gets old. Robert DeNiro plays a 70-year-old retiree who applies to be the “Senior Intern” to a CEO, Anne Hathaway, who is half his age. She initially doesn’t want to hire him because he’s “a little too observant,” but she does and what we see over the course of the film is that he morphs from intern to mentor. My experience at Airbnb was just the opposite, but shares some parallels. Brian Chesky is almost half my age and hired me to be his in-house leadership and hospitality mentor in early 2013 when most people had never heard of this little tech start-up. Within a few weeks, I realized that I needed to be as much an intern as a mentor because I’d never worked in a tech company and I often felt like both the wisest and dumbest person in the room. The founders ultimately said I was as curious as I was wise which earned me the title, “modern elder.” I coined the term “mentern” in my book “Wisdom@Work: The Making of a Modern Elder” to capture the fact that with almost half of Americans working for a younger boss and five generations in the workplace for the first time, we need to operate as mutual mentors like never before. The physics of knowledge and wisdom used to flow from old to young, but it now flows in both directions. While I could offer my Airbnb colleagues EQ (Emotional Intelligence), they could offer me DQ (Digital Intelligence) and we were all better off for it. As I spent time exploring the topic of intergenerational collaboration, I got to know the guru on this subject Marc Freedman, who started https://bit.ly/4lSdI57. He’s my modern elder as I’ve learned so much from him about how we can create a society and workplaces that value one of the most important forms of diversity, age diversity. I’m proud that Marc joined me on my podcast (https://bit.ly/47WCbmg) last week and that we’ll be co-leading a Santa Fe workshop November 10-15 called How to be a World-Class “Mentern”: Mastering the Skills of Mutual Mentorship (https://bit.ly/4g473U1) (this week’s episode with Rob Bell goes live this morning). This workshop is perfect for anyone asking the following questions: - How can I feel relevant again in a workplace full of people younger than me? - How can I distill my wisdom and share it in a way that younger folks will value it? - How can I develop a new sense of purpose by feeling like I’m having an impact? - How can I renew my sense of curiosity and openness to learning something new? - What programs exist that foster more intergenerational collaboration? Here’s a recent PBS NewsHour video on Marc Freedman’s organization CoGenerate (https://bit.ly/3HO3kNL), and how it brings the generations together to co-create the future.

Have you ever been mentored by someone 10 years younger than you? 😲😲 I have. And I highly recommend it.😊✨ During my time at L'Oréal Australia, I had the chance to speak at a leadership event where they had built an entire program around reverse mentoring. Not a buzzword. A real structure where junior talent mentored senior leaders. On everything from how Gen Z thinks, to emerging tech, to what inclusive culture actually looks like in practice. And honestly? It’s one of the smartest things a company can do. 👉🏻👉🏻 Why? Because: – Interns are closer to consumer shifts than the boardroom – New grads know TikTok and AI tools like second nature. – And junior team members often see the cultural blind spots leaders miss. The Times article on British Airways hit the nail on the head. - 80 pairs - Junior staff mentoring the C-suite. - Game-changing insights that are shaping how the airline leads from within. I have first hand seen Reverse mentoring flipping the script. It humbles leadership. It future-proofs decision-making. And it brings in the voices that matter most. At a time when everything’s evolving from platforms, behaviour, expectations, listening isn’t optional. It’s the new superpower. 💪🏻💪🏻 👇🏽 CEOs, here are my 3 actionable ways to start reverse mentoring today: 1. Form intentional pairings: Pair junior talent with leaders and set up dedicated time when these two can connect. 2. Make it safe: Set clear expectations and remove the pressure to impress. Authenticity > polish. 3. Turn insights into action: Don’t let the conversation end at “good point.” Bake learnings into culture, strategy and product. So here’s my question: When’s the last time you learned something from someone just starting out? #ReverseMentoring #Insights #GenZ #AI

Leadership in finance isn't what most people think. It's not your corner office or your impressive title. I discovered this truth climbing from individual contributor to Senior Manager in financial services. Real leadership starts before anyone calls you "boss." I led by quietly mentoring new hires. By staying late to verify reports. By supporting teammates through crushing deadlines. People began seeking my guidance not because of authority, but because of trust. And when I officially became a leader? I stumbled. I thought leaders needed all the answers. I was wrong. What my team actually needed was: • Someone who listened more than spoke • A leader who admitted uncertainty • A person who valued being authentic over being right The transformation in my leadership came when I shifted from control to empowerment. Instead of directing everything, I asked: "What's your solution to this?" "How would you approach this differently?" "What support can I provide you?" The results were remarkable. Team members took ownership. They innovated. They exceeded expectations. Culture became our foundation. We built an environment where: • Feedback flowed freely and safely • Recognition happened consistently, not occasionally • Personal growth remained a priority Even in finance's metrics-driven world, I learned the power of empathy. When a top performer faced burnout, I adjusted workloads and provided support rather than demanding more. She returned stronger and more committed than before. This approach hasn't always been easy. I've made difficult decisions. Navigated complex politics. Stood firm when unpopular but right. One of my proudest moments? Advocating for a junior team member being overlooked. That single action changed his career trajectory and reinforced our team's bond. My leadership philosophy now rests on five principles: • Authenticity - even when uncomfortable • Empowerment - developing people, not just hitting targets • Clarity - providing direction when paths seem unclear • Empathy - understanding before responding • Resilience - maintaining composure during chaos The truth I want to share with you? You can lead powerfully from wherever you stand today. Leadership isn't bestowed. It's practiced daily through intention and presence. Whether you're starting your career or midway through, your leadership journey begins with how you show up for others right now. Lead with purpose. Lead by lifting others. The financial world doesn't just need more leaders. It needs more leaders like you - authentic, empowering, and focused on what truly matters. #leadership #authentic #empower I'm Emily. Are you already leading in ways you haven't recognized?

Despite the cultural and language barrier — with 90% of the team primarily speaking Russian — last year, I tested a 'reverse mentoring' program within our organization. I recognized the invaluable insights and digital fluency of our younger members and facilitated structured sessions where they mentored senior executives. It started with informal coffee meetings and progressed to virtual sessions where ideas flowed freely over collaborative digital platforms. The results were remarkable: our senior leaders gained technical knowledge and a fresh perspective on innovation and market dynamics. Simultaneously, our junior colleagues felt empowered and appreciated, their confidence growing with each session. This initiative not only boosted team morale but also fostered a more inclusive workplace culture where creativity and mutual respect flourished naturally. My recommendation? GO FOR IT! Cognitive biases like the Dunning-Kruger effect, for example, really can hinder organisational success by limiting openness to new ideas and technological advancements. Yes, it affects the bottomline big-time. As industries evolve rapidly, fostering this sort of exchange of knowledge becomes essential for maintaining agility and staying ahead in competitive markets.

The Resilience Rewire Toolkit: 5 Reps to Train the Mind That Doesn't Break You've read the mindset shifts. Now comes the real test: Can you train for chaos before it arrives? Resilience isn't built in chaos. It's built in calm through daily reps. Yes. Here's how. 1. Replace memorization with creativity Weekly Zero-Google Challenge → Choose a real challenge. → Solve it with just your brain, pen, and paper. No tech, no search. → 15 minutes. No distractions. One founder I mentored used this to redesign an AI chatbot flow. The results beat the old "best practices" version. 2. Replace following instructions with critical thinking "Why This Way?" Habit → Ask this for every task: What's the real goal here? Is this the only way to get there? What happens if we challenge the method? You shift from executor to problem-solver. That's what leaders are built from. 3. Replace compliance with independence Power Hour: No Permission Needed → Once a week, do one thing you believe will add value without asking anyone. → Launch that internal tool. Start that draft. Redesign that ugly doc. → Own the risk. Most wait for approval. Builders take action and refine later. 4. Replace academic success with emotional resilience Bounce-Back Journal → When you fail, get rejected, or mess up. Write 4 lines: - What happened - What emotion showed up - What I learned - What I'll do differently This is how you rewire failure into fuel, not fear. 5. Replace perfect planning with adaptability Plan B Mondays → Once a week, break your own workflow. → Choose a faster, messier, or reverse method to complete one task. → Analyze what held, what cracked. Adaptability isn't built during chaos. It's rehearsed in safety. Rehearse now. So you're ready when the storm hits. These aren't hacks. They're mental reps for a world that rarely goes to plan. Pick one rep this week. Do it. Then ask yourself: Did I freeze, or did I flex?

One of the biggest misconceptions in leadership is that influence comes from telling people what to do. It doesn’t. It comes from modelling what to do. Humans are wired to pay more attention to behaviour than rhetoric. We instinctively look for evidence that tells us what is truly valued—not what is written in a strategy, spoken in a town hall, or listed in a set of values. Every leader is signalling, whether they realise it or not. What is rewarded. What is ignored. What is challenged. What is celebrated. Culture isn’t created by what leaders declare. It’s created by what they repeatedly demonstrate. Which is why role modelling is so powerful and sometimes so negative. It answers the question everyone at work is asking: “What does success actually look like here?” The irony is that the more senior you become, the less your words shape culture—and the more your behaviour does. Leadership is not performed through authority. It’s revealed through example. 📷 Roberto Ferraro

Why Every Leader Should Embrace Reverse Mentoring? Reverse mentoring, introduced by Jack Welch during his tenure as CEO of General Electric in the 1990s, reshaped how knowledge flows in organizations. Welch saw younger employees as a key resource for teaching senior leaders about emerging technologies like the internet. Over time, this approach has evolved into a dynamic tool for addressing generational, strategic, and cultural challenges in modern workplaces. Today, reverse mentoring is a game-changer for organizations looking to stay relevant. At BNY Mellon Pershing, the practice improved transparency and connection between executives and younger employees, leading to a 96% retention rate among participating Millennials. Employees felt valued as their insights influenced key decisions. Similarly, PwC and IBM have used reverse mentoring to bridge gaps in understanding diversity and inclusion. Both companies paired senior leaders with employees from underrepresented groups, facilitating conversations that led to a more empathetic and equitable work environment. At Estée Lauder, the focus shifted to business relevance. Junior mentors provided insights into consumer behavior, helping leaders adapt strategies to align with changing market trends. This initiative led to the creation of “Dreamspace,” a platform where fresh ideas could be shared across the organization. Reverse mentoring thrives on the mutual exchange of ideas. It nurtures understanding between generations, promotes innovation, and makes employees feel heard. These examples show how it equips organizations to remain agile and inclusive, while enabling leaders to evolve with the times. By embracing reverse mentoring, companies not only drive progress but also build workplaces ready for the future. #nyraleadership

Model Learning: The Power and Responsibility of Leadership by Example Last week, students in the part-time Master’s program in Business Psychology Kempten Business School took a closer look at the theory of model learning. Their reflections inspired me to write this post. Albert Bandura’s theory of model learning highlights how we learn through observing and imitating others (Bandura, 1977). Leaders are central role models for their teams, and what they model significantly shapes the organizational culture and team behavior. Yet, this role brings not only opportunities but also risks. 🔹 Positive Influence: Models of Ethics and Resilience Studies show that leaders who demonstrate ethical behavior, empathy, and resilience pass on these values to their teams (Brown & Treviño, 2006; Mayer et al., 2012). Leaders who stay calm in challenging situations and address conflicts constructively instill essential workplace competencies in their teams. 🔹 Caution: The Shadow of Negative Examples Just as positive role modeling can have a profound impact, negative behaviors from leaders are equally influential. Unethical or inconsistent actions can also “trickle down” through model learning. A lack of transparency or integrity damages trust and breeds suspicion and frustration within teams (Treviño et al., 2000). Studies show that leaders modeling negative behavior influence employees similarly, damaging the workplace culture (Schyns & Schilling, 2013). 🔹 Guidelines for Responsible Role Modeling: Ethical and Authentic Action: Leaders who don’t just speak about ethics but live by it strengthen trust and foster shared values. Awareness of Personal Impact: Inconsistent actions, like contradictory communication, can reduce team engagement. Consistency between words and actions is crucial. Conscious Avoidance of Negative Effects: Since unintended modeling can occur, leaders should be mindful of their behavior and its impact on the team. The power of model learning in leadership is a double-edged sword. The responsibility of role modeling extends far – it holds the potential for positive change but also the risk of unintentionally promoting negative behaviors. What are your thoughts on model learning? Is it a powerful tool in leadership, or is it less significant? #Leadership #LeadershipDevelopment #EthicalLeadership #TransformativeLeadership