Influencing Skills Through Communication

When I assess team dynamics, I never ask “what’s your communication process?” Instead, I ask:   - Who gets to disagree here? - Who offers the ‘obvious’ idea? - Who names the elephant in the room? - And who pushes things forward when no one’s ready? These aren’t personality traits but team conversation roles. And David Kantor’s research shows that high-performing teams cycle through 4 roles in real-time conversations: 1. Initiator - proposes direction 2. Supporter - builds on the idea 3. Challenger - tests assumptions 4. Observer - brings perspective But here’s what’s not obvious: These roles are not titles, archetypes, or fixed styles. They’re functions and they only show up when the team culture allows them. And that’s where 🧠 team psychological safety comes in. When it's high: - The Challenger dares to disagree without fear of judgment - The Observer can name what others avoid without being dismissed - The Supporter feels safe amplifying ideas, not just agreeing - And the Initiator doesn’t dominate out of silence, but lead within dialogue Because effective team communication isn’t about being present in the room and talking. It’s about ensuring the right mix of roles (!) shows up at the right time. P.S.: Which of these roles is missing (or overused) in your team? 📊 Studies: Kantor, 2012; Edmondson, 1999.

Building stronger workplace relationships is easier than you think. Here's what actually works (after 10+ years in team management): 1️⃣ Start with genuine curiosity - Ask about their projects - Listen more than you speak - Remember personal details they share 2️⃣ Create connection points - Schedule regular coffee chats - Join or start team activities - Offer help before they ask 3️⃣ Practice professional empathy - Acknowledge their challenges - Celebrate their wins (big and small) - Be reliable with commitment 4️⃣ Foster open communication - Share knowledge freely - Give credit where it's due - Address issues directly, but kindly 5️⃣ Respect boundaries - Keep work conversations professional - Don't force social interactions - Honor their time and space The key? Consistency in these actions. These aren't just "nice to have" practices. They're essential for creating a workplace where everyone thrives. Remember: Strong workplace relationships aren't built overnight. But small, daily actions make a huge difference. Try these today. Your future self (and team) will thank you. 📌 Share if you know someone who could use these tips P.S. Which of these will you try first? Drop a comment below. #employees #workplace #team

Teams don’t lose trust in big moments. They lose it in everyday conversations. After working with leaders across more than 200 organizations, I have seen the same pattern repeat. Trust rarely collapses suddenly. It erodes quietly through missed follow-ups, vague feedback, or words that create more confusion than clarity. Every sentence you speak as a leader leaves a neural imprint on your team’s brain. It either creates safety or triggers self-protection.   Over time, those small moments decide whether people open up or shut down. Here are 16 phrases that help build trust, connection, and alignment. 1/ When Setting Direction  “This is what success looks like. Let’s align on what it takes to get there.” 2/ When Delegating  “I trust your judgment on this. You have full ownership.” 3/ When Taking Responsibility  “I missed that. Here’s what I’m doing to fix it.” 4/ When Performance Slips  “This didn’t land as expected. Let’s learn and adjust together.” 5/ When Handling Conflict  “Let’s address what’s uncomfortable instead of avoiding it.” 6/ When Rebuilding Trust  “I understand how this impacted you. What can I do to make it right?” 7/ When Priorities Shift  “Our direction has changed. Let’s re-align and move forward.” 8/ When Your Instincts Trigger You  “Something feels off. Let’s explore what’s really happening.” 9/ When Seeking Candid Opinions  “I need your raw perspective. What am I missing?” 10/ When Pressure Peaks  “We’re entering a tough phase. How can I support you best?” 11/ When Giving Hard Feedback  “This might be uncomfortable, but it’s essential for your growth.” 12/ When Receiving Feedback  “Thank you for sharing that. I value your honesty.” 13/ When Standards Slip  “We agreed on a benchmark. What do you need to meet it?” 14/ When Making Commitments  “You have my word. I’ll follow through and update you.” 15/ When Checking Team Energy  “What’s really happening on the ground? Tell me without filters.” 16/ When Recognizing Excellence  “Your work made a real difference. Let’s make sure others see it too.” These are not just phrases. They are trust signals that calm the nervous system, reduce uncertainty, and build connection. In neuroscience, this phenomenon is referred to as co-regulation. When leaders communicate with clarity and empathy, it helps people feel psychologically safe, strengthens trust pathways in the brain, and raises performance across the team. Trust does not grow from authority. It grows from how safe people feel when they are around you. Which of these will you start using this week to build deeper trust in your team?

𝗗𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝗹𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘀𝗲𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗴𝗼𝗼𝗱 𝗶𝗻 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝘀? I have come to believe that most team members inherently want to extend grace and see the good in their colleagues—even during times of conflict. As someone who has interviewed a lot of people about their perceptions of colleagues, I’ve learned that while frustration and complaints are common, people are almost always willing to acknowledge the positive qualities in others when asked. However, this natural inclination toward grace is often underutilized. Too many teams fail to reach their potential, not because of friction, but because leaders haven’t fostered a culture that allows honest, constructive dialogue to flourish. In my experience, many leaders rely on personality and instinct rather than structured processes to guide their teams through challenges. While charisma or personal influence can steer a team initially, they fall short in creating the openness needed for addressing complex interpersonal issues. Without structured norms, power dynamics, fear, and ambiguity often creep in, stifling productive discussions. Process is the great equalizer, providing a powerful combination of fairness, reliability, and rigor. When leaders establish clear norms and model fidelity to the proven communication processes, they make room for honesty and grace to coexist. Teams can then address their “elephants in the room” with confidence and respect. This structured approach doesn’t eliminate friction but transforms it into an opportunity for deeper understanding and growth. Process-driven dialogue allows teams to leverage individual strengths, mitigate conflicts, and ultimately build resilient, high-performing groups. How have you seen process create the conditions for grace and honesty to play out on your teams? #friction #highgrowth #leadershipteams

WHEN TEMPERS FLARE, YOU'RE LOCKED IN A STALEMATE, OR A MULTI MILLION DOLLAR DEAL IS ON THE LINE, EFFECTIVE COMMUNICATION IS THE KEY TO TURNING IT AROUND. The right communication framework fosters understanding, strengthens relationships, and drives powerful results within your team. Both personally and professionally, effective communication is key to successful teamwork, conflict resolution, and collaboration. From construction to finance, from fashion to family offices, my high performance clients master the skills to navigate the toughest conversations and transform them into their biggest breakthroughs. And here’s how you can do it too: 1. FRAME THE POSITIVE INTENTION: Start with shared goals. Establish a shared purpose to align your conversation positively and maintain the focus on optimal outcomes. ➡️”We both want [a positive, uplifting relationship].” “This is about us being [happier, more productive].” A positive start encourages cooperation and a safe space for communication. 2. DESCRIBE THE OBSERVABLE: Present facts without emotional interpretation. Focus on specific events or behaviors rather than feelings. ➡️ “When [specific event] happened, I saw [specific observation].” Stick to observable facts and avoid personal interpretations to keep the conversation neutral. 3. SHARE THE FEELING: Express your emotions without blame. Own your feelings without blaming others, and invite the other person to share theirs. ➡️“We both feel [emotion].” “I feel [emotion] about [situation].” Take ownership of your feelings. Express them without pointing fingers and encourage others to do the same. 4. REQUEST THEIR PERSPECTIVE: Invite input and collaboration. Ask for the other person’s perspective to gain insight into their viewpoint. ➡️“How did you see that?” “What did you observe?” Listen actively and be open to hearing the other person’s thoughts, fostering mutual understanding. 5. MAKE THE ASK WITH BENEFIT EXTENSIONS Propose mutually beneficial solutions: Offer choices that meet both parties' needs. ➡️ “If [action] occurs, we would feel [emotion] and [emotion].” “Here are two options that work for me…” Present two acceptable options to empower the other person to contribute to the solution. 6. WORK TOGETHER TO BUILD A CONSENSUS Collaborate on finding the best solution: Work together to determine the best course of action and express appreciation when a decision is made. ➡️ “I appreciate the thought you’ve put into this. I’m glad we agreed on [decision].” By applying my effective communication framework, you foster open, respectful communication that builds trust, enhances collaboration, and contributes to team success. And the great news is that you can use this both personally and professionally! I’m curious… ~When was a time that you needed this framework in your life? #future #communication #success

When I first started leading teams, I thought being a good communicator meant being a good talker. But I quickly learned that listening is more important than speaking. 👂 Active Listening Active listening is about giving the speaker your undivided attention, maintaining eye contact, and asking clarifying questions. It's about understanding your team members' concerns, ideas, and perspectives. By doing so, you build trust, avoid misunderstandings, and create a safe space for open communication. ✍️ Clear and Concise Language As a leader, you'll be communicating with team members who have different backgrounds, experiences, and communication styles. That's why clear and concise language is essential. Avoid using jargon or technical terms that might confuse others. Instead, use simple language and provide specific examples to illustrate your point. This helps ensure your message is understood and acted upon. 💬 Regular Feedback Providing regular feedback is an important part of effective communication. It's about sharing your thoughts and observations with team members in a way that's helpful and constructive. This helps your team members grow and improve, and it also shows you're invested in their success. 👀 Transparency As a leader, you set the tone for your team's culture. Transparency is about sharing information openly, explaining decisions and rationales, and being approachable. By being transparent, you build trust and credibility with your team, and you create an environment where people feel comfortable sharing their thoughts and ideas. ❤️ Emotional Intelligence Emotional intelligence is also important for effective communication. It's about recognizing and managing your own emotions to effectively manage others. Practice self-awareness, empathy, and social skills to build strong relationships with your team. 🤓 Asking Open-Ended Questions I've also found that asking open-ended questions can be a powerful way to encourage critical thinking, creativity, and collaboration. Use questions that begin with what, how, or why to stimulate discussion and exploration. 🚶 Being Approachable and Available Finally, being approachable and available is important. Make time for your team members, be responsive to messages and emails, and be willing to help. By doing so, you create a safe and supportive environment where people feel comfortable coming to you with questions, concerns, or ideas. Effective communication is a skill that takes practice, patience, and persistence. It's okay to make mistakes because you'll always be learning and growing. By following these strategies, you'll be well on your way to becoming a effective communicator and a successful leader. What's a question that's challenged your thinking and made you think differently? --- 🔔 Ready to think differently about your technology career? Follow me for hard-won insights and expert advice. I've spent years learning the hard way so you don't have to.

"Clear & Fast Communication" is one of our core values and the backbone of successful teamwork. Without it, even the most talented teams can struggle to achieve their goals. Over the years, I’ve learned that effective communication isn’t just about sharing information—it’s about ensuring understanding and alignment. One of the first steps to clear communication is setting expectations. When everyone understands their roles, responsibilities, and the desired outcomes, it eliminates confusion and ensures that everyone is working toward the same goals. Regular check-ins are another essential practice. Whether it’s a daily stand-up meeting or a weekly progress review, these moments provide opportunities to clarify questions, address challenges, and celebrate progress. They also foster a sense of accountability and connection among team members. Listening is just as important as speaking. As a leader, taking the time to hear your team’s concerns, ideas, and feedback creates a culture of trust and openness. It shows that their voices matter and encourages collaboration. Using tools and technology to streamline communication can also enhance teamwork. Platforms like project management software or group messaging apps ensure that information is accessible and organized, reducing the chances of miscommunication. Lastly, clear communication involves being transparent. Sharing the “why” behind decisions and providing context for changes helps your team stay engaged and motivated. It transforms tasks into meaningful contributions to a larger mission. Clear communication isn’t just a skill—it’s a commitment to building stronger, more effective teams. By prioritizing clarity and understanding, you create an environment where collaboration and success thrive.

What makes a team thrive? Spoiler alert: It’s not just talent - it’s how the team works together, supports each other, and aligns around a shared purpose. Years ago, I was tasked with leading a team to execute a high-stakes project with an impossibly tight deadline. On paper, this team looked incredible - each member was skilled and experienced. But in reality, progress was painfully slow, and frustrations bubbled under the surface. It wasn’t a talent issue... it was a team issue. Communication silos and unclear roles were creating chaos. So, we hit pause and reset. I introduced weekly “team huddles,” where we shared progress, clarified responsibilities, and addressed challenges openly. We also carved out time to understand each other’s strengths and work preferences. The difference was night and day. Not only did we deliver on time, but we also built a level of trust and camaraderie that made every future project smoother. Effective team building isn’t about forcing collaboration - it’s about creating the conditions where collaboration happens naturally. Here’s what I’ve learned: Clarity is Key: Everyone needs to know their role, how it contributes to the goal, and who they can rely on for support. Communicate Relentlessly: Regular, transparent communication keeps everyone aligned and prevents small misunderstandings from growing into big problems. Celebrate Progress: Recognize individual and team wins along the way—it keeps morale high and strengthens bonds. Building a cohesive team takes time, intentionality, and, sometimes, a willingness to step back and re-evaluate. "Great teams don’t just happen - they’re built with trust, clarity, and a commitment to grow together." What’s the most impactful strategy you’ve used to build a strong, collaborative team? Wishing you all a productive, energized, and fulfilling Tuesday evening. Let’s keep building teams that make success not only possible but enjoyable! Chris Clevenger #TeamBuilding #Leadership #Collaboration #EmployeeEngagement #LeadershipDevelopment

I recently sat down with with Catherine Vergara, CEO of CareFor— we discussed her insights on building and retaining a highly engaged and productive office team. Her secret? A strong foundation built on three core pillars: respect, trust, and communication. These may sound basic, but Catherine elaborated on practical ways CareFor magnifies these principles daily. Here are the things I learned and loved from this episode: Cultivating Respect from Day One: · Respect isn't just a buzzword; it's woven into every interaction, starting with hiring and onboarding.  · Focus on recruiting individuals who align with your core values and ensure a welcoming environment where every team member feels valued and acknowledged.  · Even simple acts like making eye contact and expressing gratitude matter. Building Trust Through Personal Connection with Professional Boundaries: · Home care is inherently personal.  · Catherine highlighted the importance of knowing your team on a personal level while maintaining professional boundaries (she gets controversial about calling your work colleagues your ‘family’).  · Building trust involves demonstrating vulnerability by admitting mistakes and fostering an environment where open communication about challenges is encouraged.  · Investing time in getting to know your team, through initiatives like lunches or informal check-ins, can significantly strengthen trust. Prioritizing Transparent and Purposeful Communication: · Effective communication goes beyond simply relaying information.  · Catherine stressed the importance of sharing the "why" behind decisions and explaining how each team member's role contributes to the bigger picture.  · Being thoughtful about who needs to know what and when is crucial to avoid team members feeling caught off guard or out of the loop.  · Remember the power of picking up the phone or having a face-to-face conversation, especially for clarifying misunderstandings or having more meaningful discussions.  · Encourage curiosity and create a culture where questions are welcomed as opportunities for better understanding. Catherine’s emphasis on these principles has resulted in impressive retention, with 31% of their entire workforce (including caregivers) having been with them for 5+ years, and even higher retention among their care managers and leadership team. Building a thriving home care business starts with a strong, unified office team. What is one of your core strategies or tactics to retaining your office team? Drop a comment below. 

𝗪𝗲’𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗯𝗲𝗲𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲… 𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝗱𝗲𝗰𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗽𝗶𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘂𝗽, 𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗿𝘂𝗻𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗵𝗶𝗴𝗵. In those moments, it’s easy to let stress take over, to react impulsively, or to fall into defensive patterns. Instead of reacting impulsively, try using some of these phrases to manage pressure and guide your team through difficult situations: 🔹 “I need a minute to think this through.” ⤷ Take a pause before reacting. This helps avoid rash decisions and emotional responses that could escalate things. 🔹 “Help me understand your perspective.” ⤷ Shows empathy and opens the door for understanding, helping you find common ground and insights that might have been missed. 🔹 “That’s interesting, can you tell me more?” ⤷ Listening to understand, not just to respond, promotes deeper conversations and reveals solutions that might not have been obvious at first. 🔹 “I notice I’m feeling reactive right now.” ⤷ Recognizing your emotions helps you stay grounded and models vulnerability for your team. 🔹 “Let’s pause and come back to this.” ⤷ A step back can bring clarity, making it easier to address the issue thoughtfully. 🔹 “What would a good outcome look like for you?” ⤷ Refocuses the conversation on solutions, helps people feel heard, and aligns everyone on the same goals. 🔹 “I appreciate you bringing this to my attention.” ⤷ Acknowledging contributions builds trust and openness, encouraging others to share concerns. 🔹 “I see this differently, but I’m curious about your view.” ⤷ Respecting differing opinions fosters better problem-solving and innovation. 🔹 “Can we explore other options together?” ⤷ Encourages flexibility and collaboration, often leading to creative solutions. 🔹 “I’m not ready to decide yet.” ⤷ It’s okay to take time to consider all options. Thoughtful decisions are better than rushed ones. 🔹 “What am I missing here?” ⤷ A willingness to learn and get input ensures you don’t overlook important perspectives. 🔹 “Let me reflect on that and get back to you.” ⤷ Taking time to reflect before responding helps avoid impulsive decisions that might not align with your goals. When pressure hits, we often rush to fix things or make snap decisions 😅 But emotionally intelligent leadership is about creating space for clarity, connection, and collaboration, even under stress. ➟ By using these phrases, you’re helping your team stay grounded. You create an environment where calmness and clarity thrive, and you allow everyone to pause, reflect, and move forward with purpose instead of reacting impulsively 🙏🏻 ❌ Leadership isn’t about being perfect under pressure. ✅ It’s about responding thoughtfully, with compassion and openness to change. 𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗺 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗲𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝗵𝗼𝘄 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗹𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝗺𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀, 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗷𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗲𝗮𝘀𝘆 𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀.