Wedding Day Coordination

Most teams don’t get better because they don’t take time to debrief. Last year, I had the honor of doing a bunch of leadership development work alongside my dear friend and amigo, Michael French. He’s a multi-time founder with successful exits, a fantastic family, and a heart of gold. One of the most powerful tools we taught together (really he, Michael O'Brien, and Admiral Mike McCabe taught, and I amplified in my sessions) was the concept of a Topgun-style debrief — and then we practiced it ourselves after every single session as a group. It’s a simple but transformative ritual. After every experience, we’d ask each other: What went well? What could have gone better? And what actions will we take to be even better next time? That’s it. Just three questions. But when asked in a space of trust, it opens the door to continuous improvement, honest reflection, and shared learning. The coolest part? Michael started doing it at home with his son — and now his son comes home from school excited to debrief the day with his dad. That’s when you know the tool is working. The origins of this approach go back to the Navy Fighter Weapons School — better known as Topgun. In the 1960s, Navy pilots were underperforming in air combat. So they changed the way they trained. But more importantly, they changed the way they debriefed. They created a culture of constructive, positive, inclusive performance reviews — grounded in trust, openness, and the pursuit of excellence. Led to a 400% improvement in pilot effectiveness. The philosophy was clear: the debrief is not about blame or fault-finding. It’s not about who “won” the debrief. It’s about learning. It’s about getting better — together. The tone is collaborative, supportive, and often informal. The goal is to build a culture of reflection where people feel safe enough to speak, to listen, and to grow. Most organizations only do debriefs when something goes wrong. But if we wait for failure to reflect, we miss all the micro-moments that help us move from good to great. Excellence isn’t a destination. It’s a mindset. It’s the discipline of always being open to improvement — even when things are going well. Especially when things are going well. So here’s my nudge to you: give this a try. Whether it’s with your team, your family, your partner, or just yourself at the end of the day — ask those three simple questions. What went well? What could have gone better? And what actions can we take to be even better next time? Let me know if you do. I’d love to hear how it goes.

One of the greatest strengths of the SEAL Teams, that often isn't apparent in movies or TV shows, is not the high-speed technology or rigorous physical fitness. It’s our ability to constantly innovate and adapt. We do this through a simple process: The DEBRIEF. After every mission, we’d review what went right, what went wrong, and what could to do to fix it. We'd take those lessons learned and roll them right into the planning and execution of the very next mission. And then repeat that process. But this tool isn’t limited to the military. The Debrief is one of the most underrated tools for performance improvement for any team. By getting your team together at the end of any project, work week, or training evolution, you can encourage everyone on your team to come up with ways to improve efficiency and effectiveness going forward. Here are a few guidelines to make it work for your team: 1. Let people know ahead of time to come up with at least two things: one thing that went well and one thing they think could be improved. 2. Take notes. This shows the team that their feedback matters and that lessons learned aren’t just lip service. 3. Have the most junior person speak first. Junior members bring a fresh perspective and, if they speak first, are less likely to be influenced by what others say. If they speak later, they might just echo the thoughts of more senior team members. Debriefs do more than identify areas for improvement. They build a culture of innovation, of continuous learning and improvement.

If you think a debrief is only about receiving feedback, I've got news for you. You're overlooking the most important part of the learning process. Too often, debriefs are treated as a one-way download. The instructor talks at you. You listen and nod. Then move on. But how useful is that really? Modern debriefs aren’t about a red pen and a list of errors. They’re about learning how to think about your own performance. The instructo'rs role is to guide that learning. Nothing more. Because improvement doesn’t come from being given answers. It comes from understanding why things happened and what you’ll do differently next time. Here are 7 simple questions cadets (and instructors) can use after any sim to unlock real value and learning: 1️⃣ What happened and why? ⮑ Describe things objectively. No judgement, no excuses. If you can’t explain why something happened, you don’t understand it yet. 2️⃣ What worked well, what didn’t? ⮑ Don’t skip the positives. Good decisions and actions under pressure need reinforcing just as much as errors need correcting. 3️⃣ How do we repeat, or avoid this, next time? ⮑ Identify what to repeat and what to change. Insight only matters if it shapes your future behaviour. 4️⃣ How was your capacity? ⮑ Most sim problems aren’t technical. They’re capacity problems that show up when pressure increases. The key is understanding why. 5️⃣ Was safety impacted? If so, how? ⮑ Think in margins, rather than outcomes. A safe landing doesn’t automatically mean the situation was handled safely — but recognising strong safety margins matters too. 6️⃣ What patterns are emerging? ⮑ A single event may mean very little. Repeated behaviours tell you what habits are forming. 7️⃣ What do you want to work on before next time? ⮑ Cadets already have plenty to manage. A long to do list just creates overload. So agree on one specific focus area. Remember: Feedback is just data. It’s not personal. What matters is what you do with it. What's your favourite debrief question?

Don’t end your session without this… 🛑✋ One of the most common criticisms of icebreaker activities - or any playful exercise, even if it’s framed as a “serious game” - is that they’re a waste of time. And honestly? That criticism is often valid. Not because the activity itself isn’t valuable… but because facilitators skip the most crucial part: 🧠 The debrief. Without reflection, the group misses the why. The experience stays surface-level. And all that potential for insight, connection, and growth? Gone. After the activity, the fun is fading, the adrenaline is dropping… and this is exactly when most facilitators move on. But the best ones? They pause and help the group make meaning. With just a few minutes of thoughtful debriefing, everything shifts. You give participants a chance to slow down, make meaning, and apply what they’ve just felt, learned, or experienced. Because it’s not the activity itself that creates transformation, it’s what we learn from it. I was recently reminded of a debrief activity called the "Traffic Light" after watching a video by Mark Collard, which I would love to share: Instructions 📋 1. Create three spaces (physically or metaphorically) based on the colours of a traffic light: red, yellow, and green. For in-person meetings, mark the spaces using coloured tape (maybe ⭕️🪄 Matthias has a fun #Facilitape Tip for us?) on the floor or place three papers labelled “Red,” “Yellow,” and “Green.” 2. Guide the whole group from one space to the next and ask: 🟢 Green – What should we continue doing that’s working well? 🟡 Yellow – What should we pay attention to or approach with caution? 🔴 Red – What should we stop doing that’s not helping? 3. With enough time, you could also have participants pair up for a conversation about each question, then invite them to share their thoughts in the larger group. But, here’s the key: For the best outcome, adjust the questions based on your activity and debriefing purpose. Here are a few more examples: After a new team experience: 🟢 What behaviours helped us work well together? 🔴 What slowed us down? 🟡 What worked… sometimes? Midway through a retreat or training: 🟢 What’s energizing you so far? 🔴 What’s feeling unclear or overwhelming? 🟡 What’s worth revisiting? After a tough discussion: 🟢 What helped you feel heard? 🔴 What felt off or uncomfortable? 🟡 What might be worth exploring more deeply? What I love about it is that it engages the whole group (especially when you incorporate movement from one space to the next), and it provides people with a safe structure to share honest feedback. Also, I often start with green, move to red, and end with yellow. This way, we always start with something positive and don’t finish on a negative note. 👉 What are your favourite debriefing activities and methods? #facilitationtips #icemeltersbook

A lot of trainers run a great exercise… and then waste the learning moment that follows. The debrief is where performance improvement actually happens. But too often we get generic reflections: “Yeah, that was good” or “Interesting exercise.” None of that helps anyone perform better back on the job. A simple tool I use in almost every session, face-to-face or virtual, is the Feedback Grid. It structures the debrief so delegates can evaluate the outcomes of an exercise, not just how it felt. Here’s exactly how to use it straight after an activity: 1. Set up the 4 quadrants before the exercise Worked Well (+) Needs Change (Δ) Questions (?) New Ideas (💡) By having it visible from the start, delegates know there will be a structured review, not a free-for-all discussion. 2. Immediately after the exercise, ask individuals to add notes Give everyone 2–3 minutes to jot down their thoughts in each category. This stops dominant voices from setting the tone and gives you a broader view of what actually happened. In a virtual room, this is as simple as shared online sticky notes. Face-to-face, use flipcharts or a whiteboard. 3. Analyse the activity, not the activity’s “vibe” This is where most trainers go wrong. We’re not asking whether they “liked” the exercise. We’re capturing what the exercise showed about their skills, behaviours, and decision-making. Examples might include: Worked Well: “Clearer roles helped us move faster.” Needs Change: “We didn’t communicate early enough.” Questions: “How do we apply this under time pressure?” New Ideas: “Create a decision checklist before starting.” These are performance insights, not opinions. 4. Turn the grid into next-step actions Once patterns emerge, summarise 2–3 practical actions they can take into the workplace. This is where the ROI sits. The exercise becomes a rehearsal, and the grid becomes the bridge to real work. 5. Keep the pace tight A structured debrief shouldn’t drag. Five to eight minutes is enough to turn a simple exercise into a meaningful learning moment. When used properly, the Feedback Grid transforms exercises from “fun activities” into performance diagnostics. That’s the whole point of training, to improve what people do, not what they think about the training. What do you use for this? -------------------- Follow me at Sean McPheat for more L&D content and then hit the 🔔 button to stay updated on my future posts. ♻️ Save for later and repost to help others. 📄 Download a high-res PDF of this & 250 other infographics at: https://lnkd.in/eWPjAjV7

Most organizations only debrief when something goes wrong. That’s a mistake. When you only debrief the failures, you condition your team to associate the process with blame and discomfort. People shut down. They get defensive. They avoid reflection altogether. At Echelon Front, we talk often about the importance of building a debrief culture...where reflection isn’t a reaction, it’s a routine. Debrief everything. After a meeting. After a project. After a win. After a loss. Ask three simple questions: ✅ What went right? ✅ What went wrong? ✅ What can we do next time to improve? When teams normalize those conversations, they build trust. They get better faster. They create alignment and accountability without fear. Don’t wait for problems to debrief. Make it part of how you lead every day. Debrief everything. #ExtremeOwnership #Leadership #Teamwork #ContinuousImprovement #Debrief **New episode of the LEAD.WIN. Podcast is out today with me, Leif Babin and Sean Glass.** Check it out: https://lnkd.in/eWqtszZD

Five Lessons from the Home of McLaren 🏎️🏁 I recently attended an insightful session organised by Udemy at McLaren Racing. A big thank you to Genefa Murphy, PhD, Matthew Jolly for organising and to Matt Dennington, Daniel Gallo and Ian James for sharing valuable insights. Here are my five takeaways: 1️⃣ Hot and Cold Debriefs McLaren uses a two-tiered debriefing process after race weekends. The 'hot debrief' happens immediately after a race, allowing the team to discuss frustrations and missed opportunities. It's candid, capturing crucial insights. The 'cold debrief' takes place a week later, with a more detached perspective, focusing on action plans. This approach leads to continuous improvement. 2️⃣ Decentralizing Decision-Making At McLaren, decisions are made at the point of greatest knowledge, not just by hierarchy. The race team has a clear chain of command, yet specialists with data on hand make critical calls. This setup promotes a culture where individuals feel empowered to act on their expertise. 3️⃣ Cross-Functional Collaboration By encouraging collaboration between departments, McLaren cultivates empathy, allowing team members to understand different perspectives and leverage diverse skill sets. This emphasis on learning from each other creates a more flexible and adaptable workforce. 4️⃣ Resilience Through Purpose McLaren's culture is driven by a shared purpose, keeping the teams motivated even when they are not winning races. It's a reminder that purpose-driven organizations tend to be more resilient, maintaining focus even during challenging times. 5️⃣ Race for Innovation McLaren strikes a perfect balance between purpose and performance without sacrificing one for the other, leading to innovation. It’s a compelling reminder that investing in both areas results in superior outcomes. These lessons from McLaren are not only valuable in motorsports but can be applied to any industry. What key approaches do you use to drive resilience and performance in your workplace?

There is a reason military aviators obsess over the debrief. I learned the importance of it early in my career, but the Air Force Weapons School took that lesson to an entirely different level. The sortie is only half the mission. The real growth happens afterward. The debrief is where assumptions are challenged, decisions are dissected, and every action is examined with brutal honesty. It isn't about assigning blame or protecting reputations. It's about becoming better than you were a few hours earlier. That requires something that can be difficult for high-performing teams: leaving your ego at the door. Military aviators are, by nature, competitive, aggressive, and driven to accomplish the mission. Those are the traits that push us forward in combat. But those same traits can become obstacles if they prevent us from admitting mistakes. The best debriefs don't always celebrate success, they spend far more time honestly analyzing failure and that is where the real learning occurs. Why did I make that decision? What cue did I miss? How could I have communicated more effectively? What will I do differently next time? Every missed radio call, every delayed decision, every tactical error becomes an opportunity to improve. In that environment, mistakes aren't hidden—they're shared so the entire team learns from them. I've found the same principle applies far beyond aviation. Whether you're leading a startup, running a business development team, developing software, or executing a complex project, the organizations that improve the fastest are the ones willing to conduct honest debriefs. They replace defensiveness with curiosity and ego with accountability. No mission is perfect. The teams that win over the long term are the ones that are willing to look in the mirror, own what happened, and come back tomorrow just a little bit better than they were today. Debrief hard. Learn relentlessly. Improve continuously.

A while back, I sat in a leadership training led by a retired Air Force pilot who trained others at Top Gun. Pretty awesome experience. But what stuck with me most was this: After EVERY mission (success or failure), they run a structured debrief with a clear formula: 𝗙𝗮𝗰𝘁𝘀 – What happened (without opinions)? 𝗙𝗼𝗰𝘂𝘀 – What are we trying to learn here? 𝗙𝗶𝗻𝗱 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗥𝗼𝗼𝘁 𝗖𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 – Use tools like the “5 Whys” to dig deep. 𝗙𝗼𝗿𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱 – What will we do differently next time? We applied this recently at K&D Landscaping, Inc. after a new hire didn’t work out. Our gut reaction was, “they weren’t a culture fit.” But when we used this debrief framework, we realized something much harder to admit: The problem wasn’t them. It was us. → We hadn’t clearly communicated expectations. → We didn’t cover a few key things in onboarding. → We set them up with ambiguity and expected clarity in return. That 10-minute debrief saved us from repeating the mistake with the next hire. We’ve since adjusted our onboarding process, and already the difference is showing. Sometimes leadership means asking hard questions. And sometimes the answer is: We messed that up. Have you ever discovered a problem you thought was about a person... was actually about a system? #LeadershipTools #ContinuousImprovement #BusinessProcess

The longer you wait, the more you lose 👉 Memory fades 👉 Emotions settle 👉 Details blur 👉 Excuses creep in In high-performing teams, debriefing is not optional — and timing matters. That’s why the most elite teams debrief as soon as possible, while the experience is still fresh, and the truth is still accessible. As a Fighter Pilot, we always had our debrief time scheduled — usually one hour after landing. That gave us time to hydrate, gather data, and come prepared. Every debrief was conducted in a “no name / no rank” environment, focused solely on learning and performance improvement. This discipline isn’t exclusive to aviation. It’s essential for front-line operators in any high-risk, high-reliability environment — aviation, healthcare, energy, manufacturing, transportation, construction. The timing of your debrief matters. The culture you build around it matters even more. A Debrief Culture is what separates high-performing teams from everyone else. It creates space for truth, accountability, and continuous improvement — while the experience is still fresh. Because if you wait too long to learn… you won’t. #DebriefCulture #HumanFactors #HighReliability #SafetyLeadership #FighterPilotMindset #FrontlineLeadership #AfterActionReview #ContinuousImprovement