Emotional Intelligence in Sales

The spreadsheets never tell the full story. I’ve closed millions in deals across my career and let me tell you a secret most won’t: Your pitch deck won’t close the deal. Your feature list won’t either. The real sales superpower? Human connection. When I started in sales, I was obsessed with KPIs: - Call counts - Email open rates - Pipeline metrics But my biggest breakthrough came when I flipped the script. - The more I focused on people, not numbers… - The more trust I built, not just pipeline… - The more deals I closed without “selling” at all. That 5-minute “non-business” chat before a meeting? It closes more deals than most product demos ever will. Here’s what separates average salespeople from trusted advisors: - Genuinely caring about solving the client’s problems - Having the courage to say, “We’re not the right fit” - Following through even when there’s no short-term payoff The best salespeople don’t force-fit solutions. They adapt. They listen. They customize. And when markets shift (as they always do)... When new tech disrupts old models… When buyer behavior evolves... One truth never changes: People buy from people they trust. #SalesLeadership #RelationshipSelling #HumanConnection #SalesStrategy #Adaptability #TrustInBusiness #SalesInsights

Remember when we feared AI would flood B2B with robotic content? The delicious irony is it’s doing the exact opposite. For decades, B2B marketing’s unwritten rule was to strip away every trace of human emotion, leaving behind sterile facts and features. Just be rational, they said. Emotion is for consumer brands. As a result, we built jargon-filled spec sheets masquerading as ads, “Solution-driven” copy that solved nothing, and content so robotic it may as well have been written by a calculator. Now, AI holds up a mirror and shows us the truth: We forgot B2B buyers are human, too. We forgot that heartstrings loosen purse strings. Even when research showed ads tapping into emotion outperform rational B2B ads by 3× (LinkedIn B2B Institute, 2025). Humans created robotic B2B content. Now AI is helping us humanize it. Let’s look at a couple of success stories: 1. Zendesk’s "Frustration-First" Campaign - AI’s Role: Analyzed 5,000 support tickets for real human pain points. - Human Twist: Turned raw venting into relatable ads: "‘Why does every support tool feel like a maze with no exit?’ – Actual customer, 2024. Here’s the escape route." - Result: 41% more sign-ups vs. their standard "Efficient ticketing!" ads (G2 Case Study, 2024). 2. Atlassian’s "Overwhelmed Developers" LinkedIn Series - AI’s Role: Mined Reddit/developer forums for emotional pain points (e.g., "Jira makes me want to scream into the void"). - Human Twist: Created memes and confessional-style posts: "Raise your hand if your backlog feels like a horror movie sequel. 🙋♂️ We fixed that." - Result: 28% higher engagement, 2x more qualified leads (Atlassian Growth Report, Q3 2024). 3. Dropbox’s "Creative Guilt" Video Ads - AI’s Role: Identified a hidden emotion in user interviews: guilt about unused files. - Human Twist: Produced a tearjerker spot showing a father rediscovering old family photos: “Remember when ‘someday’ was a promise, not a folder?" - Result: 57% increase in premium upgrades (AdAge 2025). Instead of erasing humanity from B2B marketing, AI is helping restore it. Put this into action in 3 steps: 1️⃣ Feed AI raw customer voices (reviews, calls, LinkedIn posts). 2️⃣ Ask: "What emotions dominate? Give me exact quotes." 3️⃣ Rewrite your blandest/lowest-performing ad using those words. Your buyers want to be seen. And they’re rewarding the brands that see them. The brands winning 2025 will be those using AI to listen hardest and infuse in the right emotions. #hicm #AI #b2bmarketing

The problem isn't the product or the job you’re offering. What’s costing you is a transactional mindset. Yesterday, I caught up with a two-time founder, and it clicked for both of us—the obsession with transactions creates blinders to opportunities. This founder runs a company in an ultra-competitive space, hitting 150% of his annual goals. He’s a former ATP client and someone I continue to advise and collaborate with closely. He’s thriving in business for the same reason he’s on the ATP dream customer list: he’s intentional, not transactional. He doesn’t have all the answers, and he’s okay with that. He prioritizes feedback, relationships, and meaningful experiences with his team, customers, and candidates in the hiring process. This reminded me why I’ve spent 20+ years mastering sales and hiring: the secret to success isn’t in transactions—it’s in real human connections. We agreed—those who chase efficiency in spite of rooted connections miss out on the biggest opportunities. It's true, people crave simplicity. AND They also need reliability, connection, and trust. They want to feel that what they invest in will deliver. I’ve tested countless PLG products, and most I walk away from the same day. Why? Because I’m bombarded with emails and videos that put the burden on me to figure out the use cases and value. They rely on the hope that I'll magically figure it out and convert. Yet, in reality, I'm confused and frustrated. Talk about a risky bet! Over-marketing isn’t the same as understanding and connecting the dots. The only way to do that? Thoughtful, intentional human intervention. One key to my success in sales and hiring has been ditching the pitch and examining how people think about their goals and problems. Not assuming I know because I’ve uncovered the surface-level issue. That’s the gateway to true alignment. It’s how Avenue Talent Partners has maintained a 98% interview-to-hire ratio: focusing on connecting the dots and alignment, not transactions. It looks like this in practice: "What's important to you?" "What do you want to learn about this?" "What won't work for you? There’s plenty of time for “show and tell” later. This is why our customers tell us we’re different—being different isn’t a big shift. It’s about what happens in practice. Whenever I think I understand the situation, there’s always more to learn. Demoing a product or pitching a role is a tiny part of the process. TL;DR: Our process isn’t the priority—their needs are. Being effective and “easy to work with” doesn’t mean throwing a product, opportunity, or candidate at someone and hoping for the best. Dig deeper. It’s the only way to capture the full opportunity. And where real "value" is built. #BuildWithATP #Business #Startups #Founders

A rep called me frustrated. "I ask all the right questions, but they clam up after 10 minutes. Discovery feels like pulling teeth." I listened to her last call. She was doing everything "right" according to most sales training. Except for one thing. She was treating discovery like an interrogation instead of a conversation. Here's what I told her: Stop trying to get everything in 30 minutes. You're not a police detective gathering evidence. Instead, go deep on what matters most → their pain. Three questions that changed her entire approach: "What's driving this to be a priority right now?" "What happens if you don't solve this in the next 6 months?" "How is this impacting you personally?" Notice something? No questions about budget. No stakeholder mapping. No buying process. Just pain. Deep, emotional, get-them-talking pain. Here's what happened on next call: Prospect spent 20 minutes explaining their challenges. Shared things she never heard before. Got emotional about the daily frustration. Old Rep would've panicked: "I didn't get the buying process info!" New Rep said: "Based on everything you've shared, this sounds complex. Let's schedule another call to walk through how companies typically solve this." Prospect immediately agreed. Why? Because she proved she understood their world. The follow up call? Prospect brought their boss. Shared budget range. Outlined their evaluation timeline. All because the first call was about them, not about her information gathering checklist. Look, I get it. Sales methodology says you need certain data points. But prospects don't care about your methodology. They care about feeling understood. When you nail the pain, everything else flows naturally. The reps's close rate went from 18% to 29% just by changing her discovery approach. Same questions. Same product. Different mindset. Sales VPs: teach your reps to be consultants, not interrogators. The reps who master this thinking close bigger deals because they uncover the real emotional drivers behind every purchase decision. Ever noticed how your best discovery calls feel more like therapy sessions than sales calls? Strange, isn’t it? 😎 — How 700+ clients closed $950 million using THIS 6 step demo script: https://lnkd.in/eVb32BUx

Stop treating your prospects like calculators. I learned this lesson painfully while leading the launch of a new solution for a healthcare transformation organization. The CEO and SVP of Product Innovation were well-intentioned, but they had biases that fueled their convictions. “Show them the science and ROI. Once they see the data, they’ll switch,” said the CEO. “They’ll switch?” I asked curiously. They rarely switched for the logic. They often resisted because we didn’t understand the emotion that tied them to maintaining the status quo. Most B2B marketers still build journeys on the idea that buyers only care about features, scientific studies, and ROI models. But real people buy with their hearts as much as their heads. LinkedIn's B2B Institute found that emotional factors significantly influence B2B buying decisions, accounting for 66%, while rational factors account for the remaining 34%. When you act like every decision is a math problem, you miss the emotional needs and biases that drive action. Fear of missing out. Desire for security. The endorsement of a trusted referral. Those feelings tip the scales long before spreadsheets ever come out. Three quick shifts to make your GTM more human: 💡 Map emotions, not just touchpoints. Ask: What’s the buyer afraid of at each stage? What small win can calm that fear? Use stories to build trust. 💡 Data is important. But a 2-minute customer story about real struggle and success sticks far longer. 💡 Frame decisions around loss-aversion. “Don’t lose your edge” often lands harder than “gain more efficiency.” When you blend hard facts with a genuine understanding of how people feel, you’ll see faster decisions and deeper loyalty. Takeaway: Your next user journey should start with these questions: ✔️ “How do we show up in our customers' struggles? ✔️ "Do they see us as relevant?” ✔️ Can they see their lives as being better because of our help? Build from there. #businessgrowth #GTM #buyerjourney #CMO

Did you know there's a shadow committee evaluating every B2B deal you're trying to close—and you've never even spoken to them?! Research (https://lnkd.in/g_nsV2cH) from the B2B Institute, NewtonX, and Bain & Company reveals a fascinating blind spot: "Hidden Buyers" wield nearly equal decision-making power as your primary sales contacts (49% vs. 51%)—but they operate with completely different priorities. These key influencers may be from procurement, finance, or legal. Here's the cognitive disconnect that may be costing you deals: ➡️ Your primary buyer thinks like an engineer: Does this solve our problem? Can we implement it? What's the ROI? ➡️ Hidden Buyers think like guardians: Can we trust this company? What's their reputation? Are they legitimate players in our industry? This creates what I call the "feature-trust gap." While you're perfecting your product demo, procurement is Googling your company's credibility. While you're calculating ROI, legal is assessing your long-term viability. That means, if you're relying on product features and innovation alone to make the sale, you might lose out.  In B2B, emotional decision-making might be more critical than in B2C, not less. Consider the psychology: ✔️ Higher financial stakes amplify the need for confidence ✔️ Professional reputations are on the line—no one wants to champion a vendor that fails ✔️ Complex buying processes create more friction points where trust can erode This validates a principle I've long advocated: **great brands avoid selling products.** They don’t promote features and tout technologies without linking them to emotional values. They cultivate deep trust that travels through organizational hierarchies, reaching stakeholders you'll never meet but who hold veto power over your success. The strategic implication isn't to abandon product excellence—it's to recognize that brand strength and technical superiority must work in concert. Your Hidden Buyers aren't evaluating your latest feature release; they're evaluating whether betting their career on your company is a smart move. Question for reflection: When did you last audit your brand through the lens of someone who's never met you but whose opinion could sink your deal? P.S. For those interested in learning how to build this kind of emotionally-grounded brand power, I dive deep into these principles in "What Great Brands Do" (https://lnkd.in/bp22ccV)— still relevant after all these years.

Are your salespeople covered in Band Aids? Too often, sales leaders are on the hunt for the quick fix. The “Band Aid” solution. We study harder. We memorize scripts. We push product knowledge into our reps until they can recite it backwards and forwards. And for a while, it works. But here is the problem: Band Aids always fall off. They cover the wound, they buy us time, but eventually, we need another one. In sales, that means temporary bumps in performance but not real transformation. Here is the truth. If your sellers only learn to regurgitate product details, you are training them to compete in the most transactional game possible. And in today’s world, transaction alone will not win. Buyers expect more. They need more. Imagine this instead. What if your sellers not only knew the product inside and out, but also knew how to truly communicate? I mean really communicate, in a way that makes the person on the other side of the conversation feel seen, heard, and connected. That is not a Band Aid. That is a root solution. That is the kind of capability that does not peel away with the next quota cycle. When sellers learn to connect at the human level and deliver the product knowledge with clarity and confidence, the outcome is predictable: Stronger trust Shorter sales cycles Deeper relationships Sustainable growth No more Band Aids. Just real sales transformation. If you are a sales leader, ask yourself: are you training your people for the quick fix or equipping them for lasting change?

For some reason, I found myself thinking about the very best salespeople I’ve had the pleasure of meeting and working with over almost a quarter century —and what they all seem to have in common. In no particular order: They’re extremely confident. Sometimes it shows up as quiet confidence that outsiders wouldn’t even notice—but it’s there. They’re fighters. They don’t take s#!t, and they use every setback to fuel their next win. They learn from failure but then forget the pain of the failure like a goldfish. They’re incredibly friendly and can strike up a conversation with anyone—but they make it about the other person. They ask questions, listen closely, and truly interact. They hustle. They squeeze the most out of every day. But they also make time for fun and often blur the line between work and play in a way that works. They travel. They show up. Lunches, dinners, events, flights—they go where the people are. There’s no 9-5 mindset. Their motor runs faster. There’s a real sense of urgency in how they operate. They learn something from every interaction, bank it, and put it to use at the right moment. They don't over or under share. They network relentlessly to reach decision-makers. And when they don’t know someone, they go straight to the top—unapologetically—with a clear, confident reason to connect. And they do it consistently. They’re curious, creative, and they love ideas—and people who bring new ones to the table. And one that I love and have stolen from Danny Meyer - They collect dots and they connect dots. #sales

Emotional economies = emotional contracts. If you’re in business, you’re used to contracts. But what about the emotional ones? Here’s what you need to know: every sale is built on an emotional contract. Most founders miss it entirely. The emotional economy in B2B sales isn't about aspiration or identity. It's about fear, credibility, and career protection. Your buyer is asking: Will this make me look smart, or stupid? Can I defend this purchase in six months? What happens if I'm wrong? For B2C startups, your customers aren't just buying products. They're trading money for feelings they want more of, or feelings they're trying to avoid. Status. Belonging. Competence. Relief. Map what your buyer is seeking to feel. Or what they're desperate not to feel. Then design every touchpoint—from demos to packaging to support—to honor that emotional contract. Crowded categories (and which one isn’t these days?) don't reward the best product. They reward the brand that understands the exchange rate between product and emotion. While you're selling features, your buyer is buying emotional safety. That's why your perfectly logical pitch isn't converting. 

The fastest way to sound like every other rep and lose connection with the buyer? Describe your prospect's problem in your words instead of theirs. You say "data silos." They say "I can't find anything, it's all over the place." You say "lack of visibility." They say "I have no idea what my team is actually doing all day." You say "inefficient workflows." They say "I'm drowning and I'm doing everything twice." Same problem. Completely different language. And the second you use your words instead of theirs...you sound like every other vendor who doesn't get it. In order to truly connect, you have to change the way you talk about the problem. You don't describe the problem. You describe THEIR problem, in THEIR words. And you know where you find those words? They're on your calls. They're on CS calls. You just have to actually listen for them. When I sit down to review a call, I'm not listening to the rep. I'm listening to the prospect. Here's exactly how to mine it: - Pull 30 recent discovery calls. - Ignore what your rep said. Listen only to the prospect. - Write down the exact words they use for the pain — verbatim, not cleaned up. - Highlight the emotional words: "drowning," "frustrated," "no clue," "all over the place." - Build a swipe file of their language, sorted by problem. - Feed those exact words back into your discovery, your demo, your follow-up. A prospect once told me, "Every Monday I open the CRM and I want to throw my laptop." I never said "reporting inefficiencies" again. I said, "So... no more Monday laptop-throwing, right?" They laughed. Then they bought. This week: listen to 10 of your own calls. Not to grade the rep. To steal the customer's words. Write down 10 phrases exactly as they said them. Then go use them. Sell in their language, they feel understood. Sell in yours, they feel sold to. BONUS TIP: I've set up research agents that comb reddit, google, LI, etc to listen for how prospects speak about the problem and day to day and it updates weekly on a spreadsheet. Capturing the voice of the customer in real time!