Sales Pitch Refinement

Most people lose the room before they’ve earned the right to speak. Not because they’re boring. Not because they lack confidence. But because they skip one of the oldest storytelling techniques there is: The hook. And no — hooks aren’t just for storytellers or keynote speakers. They work when you’re: • Opening a presentation • Speaking up in a meeting • Commanding a room • Starting a difficult conversation After studying hundreds of story openings (on stage and in boardrooms), here are seven hooks that consistently work — in order of effectiveness: 1. Name the room “This is for leaders who…” Relevance comes first. When people hear themselves, they feel seen. When they feel seen, they listen. 2. Name the struggle “If you’ve ever felt stuck trying to…” This isn’t persuasion. It’s resonance. 3. Lead with a shocking statistic “Most people decide whether to trust a speaker in the first 30 seconds.” A strong stat creates urgency and authority. It signals: this matters. 4. “Did you know…?” Lead with a surprising fact or insight. Curiosity is a biological reflex — once triggered, people lean in. 5. “What if…?” Invite your listener into a possibility. It turns information into imagination. And imagination beats slides every time. 6. Start in the middle of a story “I was halfway through my Q3 results when our CEO stood up, grabbed his coffee, and walked straight out of the room.” Tension creates pull. People stay to find out what happens next. 7. Share a secret “They don’t tell you this, but…” Insider language creates intrigue — and lands best once trust is earned. Here’s the part most people miss: A good hook isn’t about being clever. It’s about signalling value upfront. Every great hook makes a silent promise: Something meaningful is about to happen for you. That’s true in stories. That’s true in presentations. That’s true when you open your mouth in a meeting. Don’t assume attention is given. In any room, it has to be earned. Which one do you avoid using — even though you know it works?

You felt the chemistry. You aced the interview. You even got a “we’ll be in touch soon.” Now what? Most candidates go silent after the interview, And then spiral while they wait. But smart candidates? They stay visible without being pushy. Here’s how to follow up strategically (and professionally): ✅ Within 24 hours: Send a thank you email Thank them for their time Mention one insight or conversation highlight Reaffirm your interest and fit 💡 Example: “Really appreciated our discussion about the upcoming product launch—it gave me even more clarity on how I can contribute from day one.” ✅ Within 5–7 days: Follow up with value Share an article or resource related to your convo Ask a thoughtful follow-up question Keep it light, collaborative, and helpful 💡 Example: “Following up on our chat about cross-functional collaboration, came across this framework I’ve used with success. Happy to share how I’ve applied it if helpful.” ✅ If you haven’t heard back after 10–14 days: Send a concise check-in Reaffirm your interest Ask about next steps 💡 Example: “Just checking in to see if there’s any update on the [Role] position. I’m still very enthusiastic about the opportunity and would love to understand what the next steps might look like.” Bonus tip: If you connected with multiple interviewers, personalize follow-ups for each. Tailored > templated. Because when you treat the follow-up as part of the process, not an afterthought, You stay top-of-mind while others fade out. 💬 What’s your go-to follow-up strategy after interviews? Drop your favorite tip below, it might help someone land their next role.

Our Head of Product, Max Radman, spent the last 2 years analyzing 1,000+ LinkedIn hooks. After 100s of hours of obsession, he noticed the best hooks are REALLY good at 2 things: 1. catching attention 2. converting attention There are thousands of different ways to do both of these within the first 200 characters of a LinkedIn post. (the “see more” cutoff limit) But the best one we've seen use a 2-line structure with the following components: 𝗟𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝟭: 𝗦𝗼𝗰𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗣𝗿𝗼𝗼𝗳 + 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻𝗮𝗹 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆𝘁𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 The opening sentence immediately builds credibility and teases a story. Example hook from me - Line 1: “I grew notus to $180k MRR using only LinkedIn” • Social proof = being able to show you did something that's relevant to others. It signals to the reader: “Oh, this is worth reading.” • (Personal) storytelling increases firepower. Everyone’s story is unique AKA. there is only 1 of it. By definition, this makes it more valuable, because you can’t find it anywhere else. Not every hook follows these criteria to a tee, but the best performing ones he’s seen leverage both. ____ 𝗟𝗶𝗻𝗲 𝟮: 𝗘𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗦𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 The 2nd line tells the reader exactly what they’ll get from the post. Example hook from me - Line 2: “If I had to start from 0 again, here are the exact 6 steps I’d follow.” • This creates curiosity. The reader knows what the post is about and why it’s relevant - but now they want to know “how it works”. • It's also specific. The reader knows what they will get in the post, which reduces uncertainty. The combination is what keeps them reading. ____ TL;DR The best hooks catch & convert. (Just like the hook of this post did.) They’re clear, specific & leave no room for interpretation, while still sparking curiosity.

Years ago, I watched one of the best enterprise salespeople I've ever known lose a million-dollar deal simply because "𝗜 𝗱𝗼𝗻'𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲 𝗽𝘂𝘀𝗵𝘆". This brilliant, capable professional was letting million-dollar opportunities slip away because she was afraid of seeming aggressive. Sound familiar? Here's the reality I've found after analyzing thousands of sales interactions: The average B2B purchase requires 8+ touches before a response, but most salespeople give up after 2-3. 𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘂𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗶𝘀𝗻'𝘁 𝗳𝗲𝘄𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗼𝘄-𝘂𝗽𝘀—𝗶𝘁'𝘀 𝗯𝗲𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝗼𝗻𝗲𝘀. Working with clients across industries, I've developed what some have called the "Goldilocks Sequence" – not too aggressive, not too passive, but just right for maximizing response rates without alienating prospects. It starts with how we view follow-ups. Stop thinking of them as "checking in" and start seeing them as opportunities to deliver additional value. For each client, we build what I call a "Follow-Up Content Library" with 5-10 genuinely valuable resources for each buyer persona – a mix of their content and third-party research addressing likely challenges. Having this ready means follow-ups can pull the most relevant resource based on the specific situation. The sequence itself has a rhythm designed to respect the prospect's time while staying on their radar: 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟭 is the initial value-focused outreach with a specific insight (never generic "I'd like to connect" language). Around 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟯, we send a gentle bump, forwarding the original email with: "I wanted to make sure this reached you. Any thoughts on the [specific insight]?" It's brief and assumes positive intent. By 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟱, we shift to an alternative channel like LinkedIn, with a personalized note referencing the insight, but still no meeting request. Around 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟴 comes the pure value-add – sharing a relevant resource with no ask attached: "Came across this [article/case study] that addresses the [challenge] we discussed. Thought you might find it valuable regardless of our conversation." 𝗗𝗮𝘆 𝟭𝟮 brings what I call the "pattern interrupt" – a brief email with an unexpected subject line and single-question format that's easy to respond to. Then, around Day 18, we send the "permission to close" message: "I'm sensing this might not be a priority right now. If that's the case, could you let me know if I should check back in the future? Happy to remove you from my follow-up list otherwise." This sequence generated a 34% response rate for an enterprise software client compared to their previous 11% using traditional methods. The key difference? Every touch adds legitimate value rather than just asking for time. And because it's systematic, it removes the emotional weight of deciding when and how to follow up. What's your most effective follow-up technique? I'm always collecting new approaches to share with clients. #SalesFollowUp #OutreachStrategy #PipelineGeneration

How to following up without following up. Following up sounds like this: “Just following up to see if you’ve had a chance to review the proposal?” Translation: “I need to close this to hit quota.” Try this instead. Instead of following up, follow through on something meaningful from your last conversation. Examples: “Was thinking about you, how’d the triathlon in Mexico go?” “Last time we talked, you mentioned [specific topic]. Thought you might find this post/article/tool interesting.” These types of follow-throughs do two things: 1. Show you’re paying attention. People like being remembered—especially for things that matter to them. 2. Keep the door open. You’re reminding them of your presence without being pushy. You’ll stand out as someone who cares, not just someone trying to close a deal. The switch? Following up → Following through

Founder-Led Sales Bootcamp #18: The anti-follow-up follow-up Let’s face it - most follow-ups are awful You know the one: “Just checking in to see if you had a chance to review…” It’s lazy, adds no value, and gets ignored. And yet, we all do it. Here’s the truth: deals don’t die because of price or competition nearly as often as they die because… people just don’t follow up well. Not consistently, not creatively, and definitely not with empathy. Your follow-up should remind them of the value, not just remind them you exist: 5 Follow-Up Tactics That Actually Work: 1️⃣ The Insight Drop Send something actually useful. "Thought of you when I read this piece on X - lines up with what you mentioned re: [pain]. Let me know if you'd like me to break down how this applies to your team." 2️⃣ The Reverse Close “Happy to pause here if priorities have shifted - I know how things move internally. Let me know either way.” By giving them an out, you remove pressure and often get a faster reply. 3️⃣ The Value Tease “Would a short walkthrough focused just on [specific goal] be helpful for you or others internally?” 4️⃣ The Close the Book This one’s powerful when things have dragged out: "I haven’t heard back, so I’m going to assume timing isn’t right and close the book on this for now. If things change, I’m always here.” It’s respectful, confident, and creates positive tension. You’ll be shocked how many replies start with, “No wait, sorry for the delay...” 5️⃣ The Mutual Action Reminder If you’ve got a Mutual Action Plan or shared plan in place: “Circling back on our shared timeline - still makes sense to aim for [milestone]?” Quick Action Plan: 💡Stop saying “just checking in.” Forever. 💡Create a 3-email follow-up flow. One value-add, one soft ask, one Close-the-Book if needed. 💡Add a reminder into your CRM 3, 7, and 14 days post-demo. Most founders give up way too early. Buyers aren’t ignoring you because they hate your product. They’re just busy. Be the one who makes follow-up frictionless.

Your opening line makes or breaks your LinkedIn post. Think of it like meeting someone for the first time. Within seconds, you’re making a judgment. Are they interesting, relevant, or someone you want to know more about? Or do you drift away and move on? Your LinkedIn audience is doing the same thing every time they scroll. That very first sentence of your post is your chance to spark curiosity, make someone pause, and encourage them to hit “see more.” If you don’t hook them there, they’ll never get to the good stuff you’ve spent time and energy creating. Your opening line is your digital first impression. And just like in real life, you rarely get a second chance. Here are 5 ways to make your hooks stronger and more engaging: ✨ Start with a bold statement – something surprising, thought-provoking, or even a little controversial. ✨ Ask a question – ideally one your ideal client is already asking themselves. ✨ Highlight a pain point – show that you understand the challenges your audience faces. ✨ Use numbers – “3 mistakes costing you visibility” is instantly more clickable than “tips to improve your posts.” ✨ Keep it short + punchy – one impactful sentence is all you need. 💡 TIP: It often helps to write the hook first to make sure your opening sentence grabs attention, and the rest of the post will more naturally flow from there. The opening line isn’t about being clever for the sake of it. It’s about making a promise: if you give me your attention, I’ll give you something valuable in return. 👉 Next time you write a post, spend as much time on the hook as you do on the body of your content. Or better yet, write it first. How much focus do you give to getting the first line of your post right? What kind of openers make you stop scrolling to read on?

I've gone viral 10+ times on LinkedIn. Every viral post started with one of these 3 hooks. Most people overthink hooks. But great hooks do one simple thing: they make you feel something. After 200+ posts, I've noticed every high-performing hook fits into 3 categories 👇 1. HELP (Promise a solution) Examples: → "Here's how I optimized my LinkedIn profile in 10 minutes." → "This AI tool saved me 10 hours per week." → "If your posts aren't getting engagement, try this." People stop scrolling when you promise to fix their problem. 2. HOPE (Show transformation) Examples: → "I went from 12 reactions to 4K in one post. Here's what changed." → "0 to 58K followers in 10 months using AI." → "I thought I'd never grow. Then I discovered this system." People want proof they can do it too. 3. HUMAN (Share vulnerability) Examples: → "I almost quit when my posts dropped from 9K to 500 reactions." → "This mistake cost me 6 months of LinkedIn growth." → "I was embarrassed to post this, but here's the truth." Vulnerability feels real. When I struggled with ideas, I thought the problem was creativity. It wasn't. I was writing information, not emotion. Once I asked, "What should the reader FEEL?" It gave my writing purpose. Pro tip: If a hook structure worked once, reuse it. Which hook type stops YOUR scroll most: Help, Hope, or Human?

10 hooks that always grab attention: (And templates you can use in under 30 seconds) Hooks are like headlines on the news. If it’s not urgent, high value or emotional - no one stops to read them. Yet people make the same mistakes: ❌ Try to sound inspirational over interesting, “Believe in yourself…” ❌ Vague promises that mean nothing, “This changed everything for me.” ❌ Follow a generic AI template like, “It’s not X, it’s Y.” Then wonder why their content is ignored. AI fatigue is at an all-time high. Every third post sounds exactly the same. The same hook, the same tone, the same problems and solutions. In the sea of sameness, clever hooks don’t stand out. Original, personal hooks do. The ones that spark tension, curiosity, even a little anxiety. Try using these 10 types of hooks (and their templates): 1/ Authority Hooks • Hooks rooted in personal stories and expertise build trust. • “We analysed 318,842 LinkedIn posts in Q3 2025. And LinkedIn has changed…” 2/ Conversation Hooks • A real dialogue instantly pulls readers into a moment. • “CEO: I’m firing our VP Sales. Me: How long have they been here?” 3/ Curiosity Hooks • State a bold claim, then tease the evidence. • “This chart is the clearest signal of where the internet is heading.” 4/ Contrarian Hooks • Challenge an accepted belief to create instant tension. • “Stop building your personal brand. Build this instead.” 5/ Pattern Break Hooks • Interrupt the reader with an unexpected truth. • “Your skills aren’t the problem. Your perspective is.” 6/ Personal Story Hooks • Go emotional and relatable without oversharing. • “Growing up, I never thought I’d get married. I was terrified I wouldn’t be a good partner.” 7/ Numbers Hooks • Data and specifics build credibility fast. • “You commit the 7 deadly sins of prompting - here’s how to fix them.” 8/ Disagreement Hooks • Attack a widely accepted “truth” to create friction and interest. • “Boring content is dead. You can follow every “rule” - and still be forgettable.” 9/ Nobody-Tells-You Hooks • Reveal a hidden truth people feel but never say. • “I interviewed 50 people who quit their jobs in 2024. Nobody tells you the real reason why:” 10/ I Was Wrong Hooks • Admit a mistake that leads to an unexpected lesson. • “The day I stopped fearing smart people was the day that changed my life.” Don’t try to sound clever. Aim to make the reader feel something - tension, excitement, or even a bit of fear. That’s what makes people stop the scroll. 📌 Want a high-res PDF of this sheet? Get it here: https://lnkd.in/gKzZUq-b ♻️ Repost to help your network write better hooks. ➕ Follow me (Will McTighe) for more like this.

Why Founders Fail at Follow-Up (And How to Fix It) You had a great meeting with an investor. You sent a quick "thanks" email. Then... silence. A week goes by. Then two. "Should I follow up? Is it too soon? Too late?" The momentum fades. The opportunity slips away. This is where countless founders fail, not in the pitch, but in the follow-up. The myth of the "one call close" is seductive, but wrong. Fundraising, hiring, and high-value sales are about building trust over time. Every interaction is a building block. Follow-up is the mortar that holds them together. A scattered follow-up signals you're overwhelmed and disorganized. A systematic follow-up signals you're ready for the big leagues. Build a system: 1. Immediate Capture: Log takeaways right after meetings 2. Clear Next Steps: Never leave without defining them 3. Cadence & Timing: Follow up within 24 hours, then strategically 4. Value in Every Touch: Share insights, not just "checking in" The most successful founders aren't the most brilliant. They're the most organized and persistent. Stop treating follow-up as a chore. Start treating it as a strategic advantage. #Founders #Startups #Sales #Fundraising #CRM #ExitClub